The Elder Statesman

Sometime back I wrote a column on common sense. I didn’t reckon on how many readers would agree with my expression of disbelief in what we perceive today as the lack of common sense. Letters poured in citing experiences readers have had with the lack of common sense.

I was particularly touched by a clipping from a religious magazine called "The Word Among Us" mailed to me by a reader. The clipping was from an unsigned article about waste. Deep into the article it touched on common sense, but with a different and surprising viewpoint.

It was about love and the article said "love does not use common sense as its barometer." Thus in marriage, it said, "each spouse is asked to care for the other as they would care for themselves."

It concluded this would not be possible without love. 

What was really touching in this common sense article was that love, not common sense, is at the heart of raising children. "Looking strictly at the numbers, a financial advisor would say that raising children is a terrible investment," the article said. It said that this enormous cost does not include parental time and energy in the child rearing process.

Then why such an investment? "Because love begets love. Love ignores common sense. Married couples have children because they want to share their love, not because of common sense."

It made me wonder exactly what it costs in dollars and cents to raise a child, a worry I do not have because all of my children are grown, some are even grandparents and all are gainfully employed.

But still, common sense drove me to seek an answer to my question. I went to that wonderful source called the internet and simply asked Google "How much does it cost to raise a child?"

There were more estimates on that question than I have space to present, but according to a recent study by the U.S. Department of Agriculture, it costs a middle-income family $250,000 to raise a child from birth to age 17. Some estimates were as low as $125,000, but after my review of the information I found, I would accept the higher figure.

I have a $125 receipt for the hospital bill when for my oldest daughter was born in 1951 birth. According to the USDA today it can easily cost between $5,000 to $8,000 for a normal delivery and up to $12,000 for a cesarean delivery and much more if there are complications.

Today, in a baby’s first year alone, parents can easily spend between $9,000 to $11,000 for diapers, formula, baby furniture, clothing, and baby gear such as car seats. Disposable diapers cost between $1,600 and $2,300 by the time the baby is potty-trained. My wife might disagree with this male statement, but in my child rearing age, disposable diapers were a luxury item and I recall her bending over the bathtub with a scrub board washing diapers. Even today, cloth diapering can save money, yet it is estimated that cloth diapering costs approximately $800 to $1,100 by the time the baby is potty-trained, not including laundry soap and other expenses for the use of a washer and dryer.

Brette McWhorter Sember, a retired lawyer and author of "Your Practical Pregnancy Planner: Everything You Need to Know About the Financial and Legal Aspects of Preparing for Your New Baby" says, "Most people are more focused on the schedule disruptions and the exhaustion they will be facing," and not the financial sticker shock of a new baby.

As I look at my seven children, 15 grandchildren and six great grandchildren, I must have had very little common sense, but the results are priceless.

(Bill Duncan can be reached by writing to P.O. Box 812, Roseburg, OR 97470)